Jeez, I get a Southern girlfriend and wake up one morning to find myself drinking chicory coffee and eating grits for breakfast.
Will someone be coming around soon to deposit a primered-up Camaro on my front lawn?
How the hell did this happen?
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You can’t have the car in the yard before the refrigerator on the front porch.
Once you do get the car, make sure you take then engine out and put it in your bathtub. That’s where it belongs.
Also, if anyone sees you eating grits, tell ‘em it’s polenta.
Start making Rommel sleep under the front porch.
Oh wait, you’ll need a porch. Look into trailer living!
Oh, whatever – I hate grits. You didn’t get that habit from me.
The coffee’s awesome, though, yeah?
You can have The Tank if you’re willing to pick it up…. ’69 Ford F100 with 7/8 of a V8 and rust holes you can put your fist through
Mmmmm chicory. Got two cans of French Market being shipped over by The Wife as I type. Coffee doesn’t get any better than that.
you will also need an extra refrigerator for your beer. the front porch is a good place to put it.
Congratulations. After you are done redecorating as advised above, may I suggest you get to work on the smokehouse, which you will need to make proper country ham? Then you can have red eye gravy with your grits.
Mmmmmm, red eye gravy…….